A year ago, I had animosity towards my dad because he never really focused on me as much as he needed. I always felt left out in a sense and didn't know what to do or who to talk to about the unrest I had.
Over the years, not having a relationship with him didn’t bother me. The thought of actually having one dwindle but one thing I did know is that if I wanted to move past this event in my life, I had to take care of the unfinished business before I was able to close that door.
It was forgiveness. I didn’t know how powerful a grudge could be on my life when I didn’t forgive.
I was trying to move forward but God was holding me back from walking into the next stage of my life until I forgave him. It wasn’t forgiving him for his actions, but it was forgiving him for me. It was a healing process for me. It was to help me move on.
I can’t change anyone but I can change how I respond to someone else’s actions. My job is to make sure I make peace with myself and with God. It’s another healing process you go through before moving forward. It helps to mend that brokenness you’ve covered up for so long and know you can find peace in God who is truly your Father.
I’m happy I forgave because I was able to breathe and let go. If I didn’t, I would’ve stunted my growth in every aspect of my life.
I can’t move forward with Him, if my heart isn’t right.
“So clean house! Make a clean sweep of malice and pretense, envy and hurtful talk. You’ve had a taste of God.” Now, like newborn infants at the breast, drink deep of God’s pure kindness.” 1 Peter 2:1-2
My spiritual walk with God is too deep for me to hold onto something I can’t change and allow an open wound to get infected. I have found that peace in God and it’s time to let go of what could’ve been when the other person has left a long time ago.
If you have been in a similar situation, please answer this question not for me but for you to get clarity.
Q: What are you holding on to that is hindering you from moving forward?
You can share this question or you can hold onto it for yourself.
Thank you for allowing me to share my truth with you.
Love,
Janelle
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